…. a little bit like the Rapture, I imagine, except instead of Christians fashionistas everywhere gather together somewhere beyond the reach of ordinary folk (Some say Milan but I have my money on London) and the collective energy of their little fashion loving hearts will elevate them to a state of being, beyond what others can humanly comprehend.
You know the type.
You can spot them a mile off.
Criminal
They don’t just obey the normal rules of do they? Like the ‘holier than thou’ church goer they’re right there in the thick of it… front row …. bible in hand (Vogue… in case you were wondering) noisy as you like practically declaring (through their love of labels and colours and catwalks) that if you cut them they would certainly bleed… Valentino Red… of course!
Bleeding love (it)!
And not only is it enough to love fashion, and shopping, and Carrie from SATC they have to explain to you why you must love all these things too!
Hallelujah!
And you thought that Jehovah’s Witnesses were a persistent bunch! You just try and deter a ferocious fashionista with your collection of head to toe faux nova check and watch them desperately try and ‘save you’. Watch in awe as they wave the latest designer lookbook in your face insisting that paradise is Prada, Choo and Primark together… in one glorious outfit… and Karl Lagerfeld forbid that you should even begin to suggest that they’re only clothes and clothes don’t really matter in the grand scheme of things now really do they? *sharp in take of breath*!
And don’t even mention that you think Ralph Lauren and Calvin Klein are one and the same person or that Comme des Garçons is secretly a euphemism for French porn!
And don’t you ever, ever, never say that Louis Vuitton is over priced or scoff at anyone who would wait three years for the privilege of paying £6000 for a bit of crocodile skin action!!
Well worth the wait!
…because you know they won’t hear a word you have to say and all they’ll say in return is;
“clearly you don’t get it do you?” and “obviously it’s because you’re not one of the chosen ones…”
Are you now?
